from the desk of . . .
Rande Wayne Smith
D.Min., Th.M., M.Div.
What The Church Needs Now – 3
KINDNESS
… based on 1 Corinthians 13:4
I was thinking about Debbie’s comment last Sunday during our discussion period. We were talking about patience, & she said, “Remember, your Mom taught you to use a spoon.” What a terrific thought to ponder,
& I found myself doing that throughout the week. In fact, I recalled many of the things my Mom taught me, that are simply 2nd nature to me now.
For example, tying my shoes … saying “please, thank you, pardon me,
& I’m sorry”, & meaning it … washing my hands before eating … listening before speaking … manners matter … do unto others as you want them to do to you … cover my mouth when sneezing … praying before going to sleep …
& “If I can’t say something nice about someone … (don’t say anything at all”).
Now I know that I’m kind of Pollyanna, but I expect everyone to live
that way, & when they don’t, it really saddens me.
This morning we’re going to talk about kindness. So, I went to my thesaurus
to discover its’ meaning & found these words: affectionate, charitable, polite, compassionate, good-hearted, gracious, thoughtful, & caring.
And that, it seems, is a good place for us to begin.
Now the Scripture passage that I’m going to use may be the shortest one you’ve ever heard a preacher read for his sermon text.
So, listen now to Good News from Paul to the Church in Corinth, & also to us at Bear Creek Church. Within our hearing comes the Word of the Lord …
“Love is kind.” (1 Corinthians 13:4)
“May my words & my thoughts be acceptable to you,
O LORD, my refuge & my redeemer!” (The Psalms 19:14)
May the Lord grant that we may engage in contemplating the mysteries of His Heavenly wisdom with really increasing devotion, to His glory and to our edification. Amen
When I think about kindness, I remember something that I witnessed 35 years ago up in Boston, & it’s as clear to me as if it happened yesterday.
Now Boston is one of my favorite cities, so as I tell this story,
it’s by no means to be a reflection on Boston, because this could obviously happen in Indianapolis, or any other city for that matter.
I was up there working on my Doctoral program, & my friend, Mike Gillern,
& I decided one Saturday afternoon to go watch a Red Sox ballgame,
& then eat at the “Cheers” bar, before heading back to school.
As we were walking along the street, out to Fenway Park,
I saw a white limousine sitting at the curb.
In the lane right beside it was a yellow cab … waiting for the light to change.
Now just before it changed the taxi moved up about 4 or 5’ at an angle so he could turn right, just in front of the limo, which would kind of cut it off. As the taxi moved around the front of the limo the driver stuck his arm out of the window & motioned … “give me space, give me space.”
About that time the limo driver got out of his vehicle, & I caught sight of a can of Coke in his hand. Then, before I realized what was happening,
with the swiftness of a Caitlin Clark pass, he threw the can at the taxi.
And he was right on the mark.
That can sailed through the open window & glanced off the driver’s arm.
It must have hurt terribly; & Coke splattered all over inside of that taxicab.
Depending upon your point of view … it was a beautiful shot.
The taxi continued turning right, while the limo driver got back into his vehicle & went straight ahead. Mike & I were standing right there.
We wondered later what would have happened if the taxi driver had had a .357 magnum with him. We’d have been right in the line of fire.
Cities can sometimes be unkind places.
Just listen to the daily news out of Indianapolis.
Corinth was apparently an unkind city,
& it looks as if the Corinthian Church could have been an unkind Church. Coming there as a visitor, we might not have wanted to stay.
Members of the congregation were taking each other to court & asserting their rights. (1 Corinthians 6:6) One member was suing another & the Church was dividing into sides. (1 Corinthians 6:7) There was sexual immorality going on, & nobody was doing anything about it. (1 Corinthians 8:1)The wealthy were coming to the Lord’s Table with big picnic baskets full of food, while the poor could hardly afford a piece of bread … & the wealthy didn’t care.
(1 Corinthians 11:33) No one was exhibiting any trace of kindness.
And yet, truth be told, we don’t live in a very kind world today any more than they did back in Corinth. Ours is a society that’s bent on rapidly becoming as unkind in its’ activities as possible. There are wonderful exceptions, of course, but the fact of the matter is that every day we’re seeing & being affected by lots & lots of acts of unkindness.
I struggle with much of what’s on television today. I really do.
From my perspective, it seems that many of the so-called “comedy” shows build their humor around disrespect & unkindness towards family members. It’s termed “put-down” humor. I wonder, does television reflect the age or reinforce it? Regardless of your answer … the news isn’t good.
If television reflects the age …
it doesn’t say much good about the day in which we live.
And if television reinforces the age … then we’re in serious trouble.
I find the same kind of insolent behavior with some of the “popular” commentators. There was an article in Time magazine a month or 2 ago entitled … “Enough.” And I’m not talking about politics solely now, but rather attitudes. Those individuals on the airways or in the written word,
who have millions of followers, & seem to do nothing but tear people apart.
And not a person’s politics, or convictions, or philosophies, that’s one thing …
but their personhood. We’re being taught a whole new way today of how to think, & act, & speak unkindly.
We’re experiencing it everywhere in our society … people being rude,
disrespectful, & just downright mean. We pin labels or derogatory phrases on people, not caring that those terms can be truly hurtful.
Bullying & cyberbullying are major issues for our children.
Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death for young people ages 15-24.
And the 2nd leading cause of death for kids 10-14! Our kids are facing a type of unkindness that is simply out of my realm of comprehension.
And I pray daily for spiritual protection for my grandchildren.
Remember Ryan White? He was the teenager from Kokomo, IN who contracted HIV/AIDS through a contaminated blood transfusion. His story broke my heart. Even though he posed absolutely no risk to any of the other students, he was banned from his school, he was treated terribly during those final years of his life. And even in death his grave was vandalized.
What about here in Nashville, the young student a couple of years ago at the High School who was singled out in the yearbook, & identified simply as “the black guy”? Because of that his family had to relocate out of IN.
You know, the list could be endless if we wanted to illustrate unkindness.
I suspect that each of us could offer our own examples from every aspect of life. The good news is that there are wonderful exceptions as God works His grace among us.
Followers of Jesus particularly must truly care about others.(Galatians 6:10)
I like to challenge people to take the qualities found in Paul’s letter to the Galatians that are called “fruits of the Spirit” … “the Spirit produces love, joy, peace, patience, KINDNESS, goodness, faithfulness, humility,
& self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23) … & honestly rate themselves.
I remember a man from one congregation that I served came to me saying that he accepted that challenge.
He told me, “You know, I came out pretty good …
but I discovered that I’m not very kind.” Isn’t that interesting?
What does a “kind” person look like? … (Picture in your mind right now
a person you consider to be kind.) … Paul writes, “Love is kind.”
So, are you a kind person? … Before answering that, let’s look at the word “kind”. It’s one of those words that has almost become colorless in our vocabulary. It’s practically meaningless.
What do we mean when we use the word “kind”?
Let me suggest that kindness is the practical expression of what’s in our heart. It clearly demonstrates what we really are. If my heart is filled with hatred & bitterness, if it contains vengeance & resentment, then it follows that I’ll become a volcano, spewing out things that’ll be the opposite of kindness. But, if the love of Christ is in my heart, then I won’t be a volcano of evil things, but rather a fountain of compassionate things.
Kindness is treating a person, not as they deserve to be treated,
but as they need to be treated. There’s an enormous difference between the 2. God has not treated us as we “deserve” to be treated;
He has treated us as we “need” to be treated. (Romans 5:8)
Kindness emerges from the revelation of God.
The God of the Scriptures is uniquely a kind God. When God speaks & acts … He expresses Himself in kindness.
In Exodus we read about God revealing Himself to the Hebrews.
He carries on a conversation with Moses. And in response, Moses asks God who He is & what He wants the people to know about Him. So, “the LORD came down in a cloud, stood with him there, & pronounced his holy name, the LORD. The LORD then passed in front of him & called out, ‘I, the LORD am a God who is full of mercy, who is kind, who doesn’t become angry quickly,
who has great love & faithfulness & is kind to 1,000’s of people.’” (Exodus 34:5-6)
Those are some of the most important words found in Scripture.
You see, the gods of all the other nations were considered to be unkind.
They were vengeful. Step out of line, & zap.
They were ready to bring devastating consequences upon the person,
his family, & even his nation. People feared the gods.
Try as hard as they could to please them, but it was never enough.
And now, here comes Israel, saying to the world,
“our God is entirely different.” He “is not easily angered.”
This was a totally new recognition & understanding.
“God is kind & full of mercy; he is patient & keeps his promise;
he is always ready to forgive & not punish.” (Joel 2:13)
These words are the foundation of our understanding of the LORD.
He is “a loving & merciful God, always patient, always kind.” (Jonah 4:2)
Some of us grew up with fathers who were unkind. They were abusive. Some of us had very kind fathers, who took us in their arms & affirmed us.
Psychologists say that it’s not uncommon to form a view of God that’s similar to our view of our fathers.
In the Gospel of Luke, we find Jesus teaching about kindness.
“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, & pray for those who mistreat you. If anyone hits you on onecheek, let him hit the other one too; if someone takes your coat, let him have your shirt as well. Give to everyone who asks you for something, & when someone takes what is yours, do not ask for it back.
Do for others just what you want them to do for you.” (Luke 6:27-31)
All of us have heard those words so many times they’ve practically lost their punch. But I’m sure when Jesus 1st said this everybody’s mouth must have dropped open. … Who can live this way? …
Jesus taught a faith that was radical in its’ responses in our daily words
& deeds. Listen to how Jesus says His followers should live.
“Love your enemies & do good to them; lend & expect nothing back. You will then have a great reward, & you will be children of the Most High God. …
Be merciful just as your Father is merciful.” (Luke 6:35-36)
Be kind, just as your heavenly Father is kind.
The Scriptures teach us to love our enemies, do good to them,
& leave judgment to God. (Matthew 5:38-45; Romans 12:17-21; 1 Peter 3:9)
Jesus & the disciples are traveling through Samaria.
Darkness comes & the disciples ask the villagers if they can stay the night. The villagers say “no”. They don’t want them.
The 12, who obviously have a lot to learn about kindness, ask Jesus,
“Do you want us to call fire down from heaven to destroy them?” (Luke 9:54)
That was their 1st thought! Immediately, revenge. You insulted me,
so I’m going to hurt you. You’re going to be sorry for treating me that way.
How do you react to people who treat you badly? …
The disciples acted unkindly.
Their feelings had been hurt, so their immediate reaction was to strike back.
At another time the issue wasn’t hospitality, but children.
Jesus is very busy & the disciples show unkindness when mothers bring their children to Him. The disciples turn them away, but Jesus says …
“Let the children come to me, & do not stop them,
because the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” (Mark 10:14)
And this busy, busy, busy Messiah shows kindness towards the children.
And even in the final moments of Jesus’ earthly life, when He’s on the cross between 2 criminals. Initially they both insulted Him, right along with the chief priests & the teachers of the Law & the elders, & even the people who were passing by. (Matthew 27:39,41,44) But suddenly 1 of the criminals stops,
“& he said to Jesus, ‘Remember me, Jesus, when you come as King!’”
“Jesus said to him, ‘I promise you that today
you will be in Paradise with me.’” (Luke 23:42-43)
Sometimes when we’re stressed over some issue, we become especially irritable with those around us. Yet, here’s Jesus, in the midst of dying,
under unimaginable stress & pain, & He’s being kind to another person …
a person who just moments before even mocked Him!
One of the marks that God’s presence is established in us is kindness.
It’s seen in the way we treat the people around us. The Apostle Paul teaches … “Be kind & tender-hearted to oneanother.” (Ephesians 4:32)
He writes, “look out for one another’s interests, not just for your own.”
(Philippians 2:4)
Kindness, not only in the way we treat each other,
but also, in the way we communicate.
I’m saddened at how quickly we’re ready to be negative with others & criticize. It’s almost as if we’d rather find fault with a person, rather than something good. This is a growing pattern even in the Christian community.
It’s the tendency to think the worst of everybody’s motives.
We do it with our leaders, our spouses, our children, our friends,
our neighbors … & when we are unkind in our thoughts, words & actions,
we’re not demonstrating the love of Christ.
The Proverbs teach … “You do yourself a favor when you are kind.
If you are cruel, you only hurt yourself.” (The Proverbs 11:17)
That means that, more often than not, when I am kind, God will assure that kindness will somehow come back to me. It will be rewarded.
What goes around … comes around.
Now 2 of my 3 graduate degrees came from G.C.T.S., which is located north of Boston. I am thankful to have had the opportunity to have studied at such a great learninginstitution.
I initially arrived on campus in September 1976, for my Master of Divinity studies. And as I was walking from the main building over to the library, I was climbing the steps & this distinguished looking gentleman was coming down. He looked over at me, stopped, & said, “Welcome to Gordon-Conwell Rande, it’s so good to have you here.” And then he went on his way,
leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open.
I soon discovered that this was Dr. Christy Wilson.
Dr. Wilson is the most Christ-like person I’ve ever met.
I honestly believe that if Jesus had lived to be 70-years-old, He would have been like Christy Wilson. Dr. Wilson was my professor of Mission & Evangelism, & went home to be with his Lord, about 25 years ago now.
Let me tell you about Dr. Wilson.
Every May he went to the Registrar’s office & got the names & pictures of all the incoming students & he’d prayeach day during the summer for them.
(He looked at my picture & prayed for me daily!)
And then when we showed up in September … he knew us!
Dr. Wilson & his wife spent many years as Presbyterian missionaries in Kabul, Afghanistan. He was the Pastor of the only Christian Church of that city. It was a small congregation, but it was there,
& it was a wonderful witness to the love of Jesus Christ.
You may remember, many years ago, when Afghanistan was being intimidated & occupied by the Russian government.
And for a # of years it was a totally dominated Communist country.
One day word came to the members of the Church in Kabul that their building was being confiscated. It was a lovely building,
built with their own hands, & now it was going to be destroyed.
(Eddie, because of your own work, along with Kay, herewith this building,
you of all people can imagine how they must have felt.)
No one believed that the government would really do that, but, when the day came closer it was clear that they fully intended to carry out that order.
All over the world Christians prayed for that congregation.
I remember this vividly back in Indiana, PA, at my home church, Graystone Church, which was very mission minded, one Sunday morning we actually went to our knees praying for the Christians in Kabul. We sent a telegram to the Afghanistan government asking that the building be saved & those Christians not be persecuted. “Please God, intervene & prevent that destruction.”
But for some reason God chose not to answer those prayers.
On 17 July 1973, at the appointed hour the bulldozers came down the road to destroy the building. A couple of weeks later word arrived back in the U.S. that the church building had been leveled … nothing was left.
Later we learned what that congregation did on that day they watched their beautiful building, the one they’d built & worshiped in, being destroyed.
The one that was “holy ground” for those believers.
Do you know what they did? …
They set up a table & served tea & pastries to the men who destroyed their church building! … They were kind to those men. To the moment the last brick was turned over by a bulldozer … they exhibited kindness there.
You & I are recipients of kindness, & God expects us,
in our own lives, to exhibit kindness, to our friends,
to strangers, & even to our enemies. “Love is kind.”
I want to be a kind person. How about you?
MARANA THA
